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Expressionism – Undated from Winter 2012

What a sick world it is, that we let things like addictions run our lives. Not only ours, but also the ones we love and actually want nothing but the best for. They halt their own progression just to help us through our bumps and falls. It’s not that they go unappreciated, but sometimes they go unnoticed.
You can’t really pay someone back for the self-sacrifice they make when taking care of you in your darker days. But that’s kinda the beauty in it, they don’t really want you to pay them back. They want you to be safe. They want you to be okay. They actually care.
In an odd way, suffering nasty addictions and reaching the pit-falls of life is the learning lesson some of us need.
Some of us get so caught up in what we need.
We turn into addicts. Saying we need this pill to balance this pill. This cigarette to balance this line of cocaine. This whiskey-sour to balance this blunt. It’s easy to turn into self-medicating doctors, deciding what we need; So easy that we take hold of it, embody it, and crash hard because we are indeed not all doctors. We don’t all have medical, or even pharmaceutical degrees. We’ve simply been basing our dosages on our issues and sadness.
Some of us get so caught up in trying to fix ourselves.
We don’t listen to the doctors. We want to avoid their advice. We’re sick. Mentally ill. Strangle-holed against our will. We have no clue what we need. Everything we’ve been doing is really just harming us. We thought we needed this and that, all along we didn’t need anything but some help.


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