Leave a comment

10/6/16


26 and fully aware.

People always say “you’re wise for your age”.

…they don’t even know.

Always have mentally carried 25 extra years of weight

Boy, does it weigh you down, when you can’t shield yourself from intuition, when you can sense what’s coming isn’t what you wanted.

“We need to talk” never means “let’s try harder and make this work”, it almost always actually means “hey, I’m gonna break your heart and make you live through your re-occurring fear of abandonment”.

So, I push them away when they get close.

Act out of desperate character and completely ignore them.

Cheat at the start of a possible meaningful relationship so if it grows into something, then crumbles, I can accept it as my own fault.

It’s really for their own good, somehow.

I promise, somehow.

I don’t do it to hurt anyone. I do it because of the sense that eventually, they’re going to hurt me.

It would probably be easier to cut ties before the strings even get tangled.

Fuck. They were never even supposed to be attached but one of us always gets roped up and ends up feeling strangled.

I just can’t stay away.

Don’t they call this insanity?

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: